On Wednesday I had a blood work to check my estrogen and progesterone levels. The nurse called and said my numbers looked FANTASTIC! This was nice to hear, but I still had to battle with worry.
So after a few days of negative tests I decided to stop for a day or two. I was strong the next morning and did not test! I was so proud of myself, but still found my self starting to go down the spiral of fear and sorrow. Thankfully I was able to stop myself from going too deep and turned on the worship music and turned my focus away from the circumstances to Jesus and simply worshiped him (while ironing). It's amazing what that can do for your heart! I'm so thankful I have God to help me when things are hard!
However....that afternoon I tossed and turned as I tried to nap which has been a regular need since returning from CA...So I got up and decided to take a test...I figured I have enough of them I might as well use them. Besides, it's the afternoon so my pee is diluted so there is a high probability that it will be negative so it won't affect me (Haha, more lying to myself). I did and when I looked at it right after, it was negative...I switched the laundry and looked at it again just a few minutes later and I saw a faint line!!!! I was over the moon!!! I text my hubby a picture of it and he didn't look close and thought if it was positive it would show a + not that he should be looking for // (two lines). So he just thought I was fessing up that I gave in and took a test and that it was negative! The next morning I took another test and sure enough two lines. It's still not super dark, but definitely there!!
I've been pretty tired, and peeing ALL the time!! I've also started being fairly nauseous and smells are getting to me, but I thank GOD for pregnancy symptoms!! Funny how after having 4 babies even though it was 5+ years ago, my belly remembers the shape to go into! So at 4 weeks prego, I'm basically pulling out the few maternity clothes I've gathered since starting this process and looking for more!
There's still a long way to go so I speak life to my babies and break death and any assignment of the enemy several times a day. Pretty much anytime fear tries to come in. I would appreciate you all praying that with me! Monday I get blood work to check my HCG levels and then again on Wednesday to make sure they are doubling. Then around the last week of March I will go in for an ultrasound to check on my precious beans!!
We would also appreciate prayers and gifts for our financial need. We appreciate all levels of support!!
SO EXCITED FOR YOU :) AHHH Love Dr. K. What a BLESSING!! Brings back memories of our sweet one :)
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